Perpendicular Paths

A lover of corners. That’s who I am. They are dark and cozy and nurse my despair,

I have come to look for corners. You should look too and find me there,

‘tis been a many long night, a prickly road, a starless sky, a bumpy ride,

I have come to belong to my corners, they welcome me home, I don’t like the wide open  I don’t have the tools,

I am a maze of corners, You will find them everywhere. Things used to grow here, now there’s only the bare,

I brew potions in the corners. Don’t be fooled, you won’t be spared, the things that lurk inside me will swallow you without a care,

Good and gold you are, whole and supple, luscious and plentiful, warm and vigorous, loving and loved

I want to give you more than corners, but I’m afraid they’re all I have. I was an open field once too,

Let’s not talk about it, it makes me sad

Forever.Land

I think of childhood as a time of forevers ad infinitum,

Everything's immortal, large, neverending 

Everything's draped in pretend capes woven with irreverent confidence, 

Everything's embellished with memories of excitement and euphoria of discovery, 

Not anymore, not now, no, I am no longer a child, 

Now, saddled with the weight of many a long-winding-dead-ended choices, 

Now, living with the selective amnesia and 'why's I don't have answers to, 

Now, without warm and fuzzy dreams of forevers and ever afters and ecstatic never-endings, 

I don't know, you know? 

So, I write these words, 

I want to remember, 

How this felt, 

Face up, bodies entwined, floating serenely in the ocean of my love, 

Lazy-eyed, satiatedly gazing upon the infinite twilit sky of your love, 

Whatever else happens, whatever we may become, whatever path we choose, 

I want to remember, 

How in this moment, we ARE love...

Drought

I wish I had the words to tell you how much I miss you, 
Staying up all night conjuring images of your long fingers on my forehead,
Imagining the Haven that is the crook of your talc perfumed slender neck,
Remembering how you pink-ed when teased, laughter sliding out under pretence righteousness,
Admiring how you dressed in those crushed, hastily picked out outfits that had nothing on your Cape of kindness and love,
Longing for those kisses you fortified me with while I was still half asleep and you up at dawn-
The way I do to my daughter now,
Aching for the way your shadow cast formidably upon troubles, transforming them magician-like... Dragon to bunny,

DON'T. STOP. IT HURTS. I WASN'T READY.

I wish I had the words to tell you how much I miss you,
But since you're gone,  who would listen anyway?

Is it okay...?
My sleep-glued eyes open to heaven,
Sun-lined-gold-bronze-back-of-you-breathing even,
The summation of my aspirations for this lifetime,
Is that okay?

I think I've reached that point
where

Feeling. Anything. Hurts ...

Listen,
I need to tell you something, I might be sinking
I love you, okay?

Quagmire

Sometimes my thoughts grow far from me, 
Like branches from the trunk of a grand oak tree,
I look up at them; they seem another entity,
I watch them and tire from this incredulity,
Elsewhere voices, my voices,  echo,  'could this be me?'
The space inside my head is a crowded place I cannot leave,
Wandering I wonder detachedly, the running reel,
A thought throbs in the background,  fleetingly,
Could any other but it's own flourish from the trunk of the ol' oak tree?

Some early-morning clarity served up in cut-crystal,
A penny drops,'clink-chink!!' echoing against the exhausting eternity of consciousness,
That maybe when the shot finds its mark, when the sleeping pill overdose takes its course,
when the footstool slips away from under feet, when the pavement rushes at the incoming skull,
when the bathwater turns crimson red, when the lungs have surrendered to asphyxiation by gas,
It is not this life that is traded for death, but the weight of all thoughts, all fears, all dreams, all hopes,
The accumulation of this emotional excess,  finally slides out of the once-throbbing chest...

TNT

Feeling the earth shudder under her feet once more,
She felt a strange kinship to a stone quarry,
Her three-dimensional landscape having been explored, sized up, drilled with explosive-laden holes and blown violently up to the sky, Just another source of construction material...
For those who now left behind a wasteland - an unsightly blemish on the panorama

Mice and men

It'll hold you together - my love that is a thing of absolutes, 
So that when I leave, it'll pied-piper away each and every piece of your being

 Strange are these humans, strange is their nature,' said one star to another
 The strangest perhaps they are when they tie their life with another,' said the other.
'Demons they seem to seek, where there are none to be found,
 experience cautions - much happiness in love a bad omen, it says,'
'Yet the most apparent demons -claws, fangs and all - shall no eye perceive,
 bleeding preferred to drowning, too deep in the ocean of love might they be seen,
'you see, to implode is a trait we thought we had mastered, for this is how we die,
 but burning out from within to without, is their way of being alive' the stars agree.